Tuesday, January 5, 2021

     I'm going to try to do this more often, just because I want to write more often, and the only way to get yourself writing is...to write. This past week or so has been such a roller coaster in my life, but all of it in a positive way. I've been super lucky, especially at the end of this year when things are tough for so many. So this isn't to honk anyone off or make anyone feel bad, I've just had a great last couple of days and I wanted to share that with everyone.

    Let's get the little stuff out of the way. I got vaccinated a few weeks ago and I'm only a few days from getting my second jab, so yay! By the weekend, our house will be totally vaccinated, and that's a HUGE burden off everyone's shoulders.

    Secondly, I submitted a piece to Shrapnel. I know it's a long process, and I probably won't know anything for a while, but I'm super excited. It's not my normal fanfic type of stuff, it's a totally different story that popped into my head after a few people out there gave me a little prodding to submit something. Long term goals are to get a handful of stories in the stable with this new intent in mind, and hopefully something will sprout from all of it. On the plus side, I've gotten lots of encouragement from a lot of really great people--you all know who you are-- and I feel so much better about my writing than I ever have. Writing has always been an outlet for me, but seeing other people react positively to it has been so validating and encouraging.

    And then there's the big one. I'm getting hitched! I know it's supposed to be some big pre-planned and staged event, but Sophie and I's was a very natural event. We happened to be sitting on the sofa talking, watching I don't know what on TV, and Sophie is like, "You know, we should get married in the new year." I kind of dismissed it at first, but she was serious, and before I knew it, I had my best friend in the whole entire universe there on a knee in front of me asking me to be her wife forever. There was a lot of hugging, a little crying, and, well, you know the rest.

    I actually put it up on Twitter before anything else, and as anyone who knows me in real life, Twitter is my safe place that's a very separate bubble from my family connections and professional life. I don't have family on there, and I don't bring my work on there either. It's a healthy segmentation that works for me and keeps stress to a minimum. I use it to connect with people about everything from Battletech to LGBTQ+ rights to politics to skepticism.

    So that left me thinking, how on earth am I going to tell my parents? Now, my parents are sweet and understanding, and I know that my coming out relatively late in life was confusing for them, but they have been so supportive of Sophie and Me every step of the way that I knew it wouldn't be an actual problem, but I was still left with the problem of how to tell them. Covid has turned everything on it's head, so I couldn't stage an innocent little holiday meetup and just slip it in. So finally I just worked up the nerve and called them.

    And wow, they were supportive beyond my wildest dreams. I always knew they had come to accept this part of me, but the warmth of their reaction was just such a huge affirmation that it meant the world to me. We talked and laughed and were all happy, and then my mom, being my mom, sprung the question on me...."So when will we be getting grandchildren?"

    I brushed the question off at the time, as there really wasn't an answer that I could give by myself, but it got the ball rolling and later that day Sophie and I sat down and had one of the most serious talks we have ever had, which isn't saying much if you know what goofballs we are, but I digress. 

    It opened up so many questions. I had always assumed I would have kids someday, but as I came to grow comfortable with my sexuality, I kind of put that thought in a box and closed the drawer. But there, talking with Sophie about it, it all melded so naturally. I still wanted kids, and of course I wanted to have them with the love of my life, but how the heck was that possible? For such a big decision, I seriously had never really dived into the mechanics of it. We spent the better part of an evening scouring the internet for resources and ideas and slowly formed a plan in what has to be the most rational instance of deciding to have children ever.

    So we have a plan, and a rough timetable, just no firm dates. And of course, everything depends on Covid. But I'm so excited for the year to come for Sophie, and screw 2020, we're going to make 2021 an amazing year. I hope you all have an equally amazing 2021!

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