Port
Howard
Towne
Federated
Suns
29
April, 3077
Learning to play was fun. She didn’t
even order any more drinks, she just soaked in the exhilharation of doing
something so mundane and fun. Will taught her the basics, and in no time, she
was reasonably competent at playing.
She didn’t know how much time had
passed, but the bartender hollered that it was last call. She didn’t want the
night to end. She didn’t want this life to end. Tomorrow would be more blood
and guts, but tonight she was living for the first time in a long time.
“Guess this is where we part ways,
Zee. I hope you had a good night.”
She didn’t know why, but she slid
her arm into his. “Does it have to end?”
She was running on adrenaline and
autopilot now. She didn’t know why she didn’t want the night to end, but she
simply didn’t.
“That’s a loaded question, Corporal”
“I’m serious. You picked me for a
reason, the night doesn’t have to end. What do you have waiting for you?”
He smiled coyly. “A nice date with a
real bed in a hotel a few blocks from here. They put us Mechwarriors up pretty
well.”
She grinned. “Big enough for two?”
He chuckled. “Rather bold of you, Corporal”
“No timid medics in the field,
Mechjock”
She didn’t know why she was doing
this. It was the last thing on her mind when she had left the base for the
evening, but now she wanted a connection more than anything. Something real.
Something to survive on.
Less than half an hour later, they
were in Will’s room at one of the pricier hotels on Towne. It had been quite
some time since she had been with a guy. She was aggressive, making sure that
she got what she wanted.
Will was happy to oblige her, and
the two went on for what seemed like hours. Finally, she found herself laying
on her back, her eyes closed, letting her heartbeat return to normal.
“You don’t mess around, do you?” he
asked.
“No, I’m not normally like this. Tonight
was just….different. I needed to let go. You have no idea what it’s like
picking up the pieces of the mess that you soldiers make.”
“I have some fair idea. But I take
your point. So, did it work?”
She opened her eyes. “It did. For a
while. It’s still there, but it’s quiet right now.”
“Why do you do it?”
She paused. “I don’t rightly know. I
enlisted for some adventure, but I never imagined anything like this. Now….it’s
like I do it because it’s all I have. It’s all that keeps me going. I can still
remember the first Mechwarrior I lost in the field. It’s like I have blood on
my hands ever since. I have to keep going, because you guys keep destroying
things.”
He rubbed her shoulder gently. “Don’t
you think that’s a bit harsh?”
“I didn’t mean it like that. I know
that this is a just war. It must happen. The Blakists must be stopped. But that’s
all so macro-level. It’s the micro where things break down, where things hurt.”
“Have you been in long?”
“Only a few years. I never dreamed I
would see action, I signed up before the whole Jihad cooked off. You?”
“I’ve been in forever. I knew I
wanted to be a Mechwarrior from the time I could form a sentence. It’s just in
my blood. It’s in my family. This isn’t my first fight. I fought in the Civil
War. That’s where I learned my trade. That was a just war too, kicking
Katherine off the throne. But it doesn’t matter, it’s just what I do, it’s who
I am.”
“Do you think we will win this one?”
“We have to. There has to be
something better than the Blakist tyranny. It has to end.”
She sighed. “But will it ever end?
Or will there just be another war after this one? And another one after that?
Seems to be all we’re good at is war.”
“I don’t know, there’s something
more to this one. Something that says maybe it will end things once and for
all. That we’ll get back the state that we love and we can just all live in a
state of peace. Or at least a state of not war. This thing is going to be huge.
It’s going to end on Terra.”
“Have you ever been there?”
“Me? Never. Never held much allure
for me either. But it’s where everything started, and it’s where it all has to
end. I just hope I’m alive to see the end.”
“You and me both. I’ve never really
thought of the end of all this. It has to end, but I’ve never given it a
thought since this whole thing started. It’s like I’ve been living my life on
autopilot, no control over anything. At least you guys get to shape how things
go.”
He pulled her closer to him. “But we’re
all still just pieces of the machine. I break things. You fix them. We keep on
going. We serve the Princess, we serve the Suns. We just keep going.”
She nestled herself closer to his
body. “Philosophy 101. On the battlefield. I’m glad we had this.”
“I didn’t mean for this to happen.”
“Do you regret it?”
“No regrets. We keep on going. What’s
next for you, Corporal?”
She sighed heavily. “Wherever the
next fight is. I’m sure there will be a next fight. I hate being space-side, so
I hope that it’s quick. What about you?”
“I have no idea. We go where the
danger is. I’m not sure if we’ll be stationed with this group the whole time or
if we’ll be detatched. It’s the nature of the beast.”
That was when it dawned on her. The
7th Lancers. This guy was part of the Fox’s Teeth. He would be
seeing the harshest of the harsh action in this war. He would be seeing far
more prominent battlefields than she would. If she made it. She kept reminding
herself, if she made it.
“Thank you.” She said.
“For what?”
“For this. For helping me feel alive
for a little while. For reminding me why we do what we do. For doing what you
do.”
With that, she fell asleep. A calm,
peaceful sleep for the first time in a long time.
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