New Demeter City

Demeter

Word of Blake Protectorate

19 February 3077

 

 

            Azalea Thomas had been in the shower for over 20 minutes. It didn’t matter that the water in the field shower was cold, she kept scrubbing, trying to scrub the blood away. There was no reason that this should be any different than a hundred other scrub downs after a long shift at a M*A*S*H unit, but it was. This time it was different. No matter how hard she scrubbed, she could not get the blood off her hands.

            “Zee, you okay in there? You’re growing old, you know.” The voice of her friend and fellow nurse Bella shocked her back to reality.

            Her hands were clean, but there was still blood on them. “Yeah, I’m fine, Bella.”

            She cranked the knob and shut off the flow of water, closing her eyes and steeling herself to put the mask back on. The mask that said she was fine to the world, when in fact, she was horribly broken from the death of a young MechWarrior in her care just hours before.

            She wasn’t a combat medic, she wasn’t made for this. She just wanted to go back to the sterile environs of a field hospital, where at least she could compartmentalize things in some fashion. Once that happened, everything would be fine. She would be fine.

            She wrapped herself in a towel and left the shower stall, finding her friend waiting for her in the locker area. She dried herself and dressed as quickly as she could, in silence.

            “You sure you’re okay, Zee? You seem…off”

            “I’m fine, just a rough shift, you know. Things will be fine in no time.”

            She looked down at her hands again. Clean, but stained with blood, still.

            “Dr. Killmeade wants to see you when you’re up for it. Sgt Grahame has been hounding me for the last ten minutes or so.”

            “Yeah, I’ll just get sorted and head right over.”

            Bella put her hand on Azalea’s shoulder. “You know, you can just go back to working in the hospital. You don’t have to go back into the field if you don’t want to.”

            She nodded. “I know, that’s what I plan on doing. Being out in the field…it’s just not for me.”

            She had barely gotten her hair squared away when the Sergeant rounded the corner. “Thomas, the Doc wants to see you ASAP. I wouldn’t keep him waiting long.”

            He was right, of course. The sooner she got things sorted out with Dr. Killmeade, the sooner she could put this whole mess behind her.

            A few moments later, she found herself outside of Killmeade’s makeshift office, pausing before she entered. Why did it feel like reporting to the principal’s office? Dr. Marcus Kilmeade was young for a doctor, or at least it seemed so in the Fifth Crucis Lancers, but as her supervising physician he had always been fair to her.

            She knocked on the door, and entered when he signaled.

            “Corporal Thomas, glad to see you.”

            “Thank you sir”

            “I hear that you had a rough time in the combat evac zone today and you want to transfer back to field hospital duty.”

            She steeled herself. “ Yes sir. I don’t think I’m cut out for that sort of work.”

            “You lost a patient on your first outing, that can be rough. But I don’t agree that you aren’t suited for the assignment. You handled yourself well, I heard only good things from the front.”

            “It’s not that I lost him, sir. It’s just…there was nothing I could do.”

            “And that is where you’re wrong, Corporal. You did do something . You were there for that poor boy at the end. That’s no small thing. You didn’t lose your wits, you stayed with him, and you handled yourself admirably.”

            I still feel like a failure, sir.”

            I’m going to be honest with you, we are short on combat medics. It’s a dangerous job, and not everyone is cut out for it. But I feel like you are.”

            “So you’re denying my request to transfer back to field hospital work?”

            He shook his head. “I’m asking you to stay in this new role. You had a hard time of it, but I think that you can make a go of it. We need people like you out there. This damn war isn’t going to end any time soon. There are going to be more battles, and a lot more soldiers out in the field that need what you can give. Some of them will make it, some of them won’t. But you’ll do a service to all of them.”

            She paused. She couldn’t believe that she was even considering it. She still had blood on her hands. How could she go forward with this?

            “I understand, sir. I’m willing to give it a try”

            And with that, her life was changed forever.